Report on Hong Kong’s NEETs
Question prompt — Q7, Learning English through Social Issues
You are working on a project entitled ‘Hong Kong’s NEETs’. NEETs are young people who are not in education, employment or training. Many of these young people spend their time at home playing video games or surfing the Internet.
Write a report to explain why the number of NEETs in Hong Kong is rising and suggest what can be done to help these youths. Give reasons to support your suggestions.
(~400 words)
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Booklet p.9 (lines 1–23)
1Report on Hong Kong’s NEETs
2Introduction
3NEETs refer to young people who aren’t in education,
4employment or training. In recent years, it is observed that
5there is a rising tide of youngsters becoming NEETs. In
6order to alleviate such a situation, this report provides the
7reasons for this phenomenon and the solutions, with respect
8to the deep-rooted causes of NEETs. It is high time for
9citizens to delve into this issue and help those teenagers out.
10Causes of the rising current number of people becoming NEETs
11(1) Academic underachievement and loss of direction
12In this day and age, the educational system in Hong Kong
13indoctrinated into students is ossified. Schools put great
14emphasis on academic excellence while ignore ignoring the work of unearthing
15students’ potential. Within With the competition between students
16becoming fierce, they have to burn their midnight oil and
17study around the clock. There is even a myth that only
18academic high-flyers are doomed to be successful. Facing such
19tremendous pressure, underachievers cannot obtain satisfaction
20from their school life, thinking that they are useless. In
21order to escape from this suffocating school environment, they
22leave school and crave for relief. However, they are at the same
23time indulging in their own world, becoming NEETs.
Booklet p.10 (lines 24–46)
24(2) Adolescents lacking soft skills
25In this exam-oriented educational system, students lack
26the chance for training soft skills as most of their
27time is spent on doing past papers and supplementary
28exercises. With their counterparts in China or other Asian
29cities swarming to Hong Kong, our teenagers face intense
30competition in landing jobs. Their counterparts’ excellent
31performance in IT skills, communication skills, and
32problem-solving skills definitely captures the hearts and minds
33of Hong Kong employers. As a result, youngsters are
34disheartened by the consecutive refusals of job applications.
35Indulging in the sea of sorrow spiral of rejection, they are unwilling to find
36jobs anymore and thus become NEETs.
37Solutions
38(1) Include life-planning programmes in the curriculum
39In order to provide aid to underachievers, life-planning
40programmes should be included in the curriculum of secondary
41education. In this programme, students can realise that being
42a high-flyer is not the only way to success. Through this
43academic programme, students can spot their strengths and
44weaknesses, finding an a unique yet suitable career path
45for themselves. Underachievers will no longer have the perception
46that they are useless and inferior, lowering their chances
Booklet p.11 (lines 47–70)
47of to be becoming NEETs.
48(2) Provide soft-skills training for adolescents
49As aforementioned, job seekers are refused by
50employers because of lacking their lack of soft skills. In light of this
51problem, soft-skills training programmes can be provided
52by the government. For instance, a problem-based learning system
53can be included in the programme. A question is proposed
54by the tutor and participants are required to solve the
55problem with their group-mates by searching for information
56and discussing it. Such trainings can hone the soft skills
57of job seekers, sharpening their competitive edge. With this
58programme being launched, adolescents are less likely
59to be unemployed and thus they are not becoming less likely
60to become NEETs.
61Conclusion
62With the above solutions, it is foreseeable that the
63number of NEETs will drop persistently. It is high time for
64us to cooperate together and provide a helping hand to NEETs,
65facilitating their reintegration into our society.
Word count. The report runs to roughly 500 words against the 400-word brief — about 25% over.
Format observance. The student treats the report-genre conventions seriously: a centred underlined title, an Introduction, two top-level sections (Causes / Solutions) each with numbered sub-headings, and a Conclusion. This is exactly the document architecture the marker is looking for on Q7.
Format observance. The student treats the report-genre conventions seriously: a centred underlined title, an Introduction, two top-level sections (Causes / Solutions) each with numbered sub-headings, and a Conclusion. This is exactly the document architecture the marker is looking for on Q7.
Strengths to praise
1. Report-genre conventions observed throughout
Centred underlined title; explicit Introduction and Conclusion headings; two top-level sections (Causes / Solutions), each broken into numbered sub-points with their own sub-headings. The student treats Q7 as a real report, not an essay in disguise.
2. Causes and solutions pair cleanly
Cause 1 (academic underachievement) is answered by Solution 1 (life-planning programmes). Cause 2 (lack of soft skills) is answered by Solution 2 (soft-skills training). The symmetry isn’t accidental — the writer designed the report before writing it.
3. The introduction defines the term
The first sentence defines NEET before using it — the basic professional-report move. Even though the prompt already explains NEET, repeating the definition in the writer’s own words signals control of the topic.
4. Real engagement with HK-specific context
The report names HK-specific drivers without ever using the phrase “Hong Kong context”: exam-oriented system, past papers and supplementary exercises, counterparts in China or other Asian cities swarming to Hong Kong. The Asian-competition framing locates HK’s NEET problem in regional labour-market dynamics.
5. Concretely implementable solutions
The report doesn’t stop at “we should help these young people”. Solution 1 names a specific intervention (life-planning programmes in the curriculum). Solution 2 names a specific format (problem-based learning, tutor-led, group-based). Specificity separates a strong report from a generic one.
6. Sophisticated vocabulary in natural collocations
Rising tide, deep-rooted causes, delve into, ossified, unearthing potential, burn the midnight oil, high-flyers, suffocating environment, swarming to, captures the hearts and minds, hone, sharpening their competitive edge, reintegration. The lexis is consistently formal-policy-adjacent — exactly the register a NEETs report wants.
7. Names a real pedagogical method
“Problem-based learning” (PBL) is a real, named educational methodology — the writer isn’t inventing a term, they’re deploying a recognised one. This signals reading outside the curriculum.
Grammar notes
| Issue | Explanation |
|---|---|
(line 13) the educational system in Hong Kong indoctrinated into students is ossified → the educational system in Hong Kong is ossified |
The phrase indoctrinated into students seems to be a fragment from an earlier draft that wasn’t fully struck through. The cleanest read keeps only the main clause: the system is ossified. |
(line 14) while ignore unearthing students’ potential → while ignoring the work of unearthing students’ potential |
After while + base verb you need either a continuous participle (ignoring) or a full subordinate clause (while they ignore). The student uses the bare infinitive, which doesn’t resolve. |
(line 15) Within the competition between students becoming fierce → With competition between students becoming fierce |
The intended construction is with + noun + present-participle clause: with competition becoming fierce. Within doesn’t licence that pattern. |
(line 18) only academic high-flyers are doomed to be successful → only academic high-flyers are destined to succeed |
Doomed carries an unmistakably negative charge (doomed to fail, doomed to die). Success is not a doom. The right verb here is destined or bound. |
(line 16) they have to burn their midnight oil and study around the clock → they have to burn the midnight oil and study around the clock |
The idiom is burn the midnight oil, not burn their midnight oil. (The image is a single shared lamp, not a personal stash of oil per student.) |
(line 22) they leave school and crave for relief → they leave school in search of relief / and crave relief |
Crave is transitive: you crave something, not crave for it. The student’s pattern (crave for X) calques from older British usage but reads as off in modern prose. |
(line 35) Indulging in the sea of sorrow → Sinking into the spiral of rejection / Demoralised by the rejections |
Two issues. (i) Indulge in typically pairs with positive or pleasurable nouns (indulge in a chocolate, in nostalgia, in self-pity); pairing it with sorrow reads as off. (ii) The sea of sorrow is melodramatic for what is, after all, repeated job rejections. |
(line 44) finding an unique yet suitable career path → finding a unique yet suitable career path |
Unique begins with the consonant sound /ju:/ (“you-nique”), so the article is a, not an. Same rule applies to a university, a European, a one-day pass. |
(line 45) finding … a career path for them → finding … a career path for themselves |
The subject of the participle (students … finding a career path) is the same as the object the path is for. Reflexive: for themselves. |
(lines 46–47) lowering their chances to be NEETs → lowering their chances of becoming NEETs |
The chance of + gerund is the standard pattern: the chance of winning, the chance of failing, the chance of becoming NEETs. To be + infinitive doesn’t work after chance. |
(line 50) refused by employers because of lacking soft skills → because of their lack of soft skills |
Because of + noun phrase. Lacking is a participle, not a noun — the noun is lack. (Alternative: because they lack soft skills, with a full clause.) |
(line 56) Such trainings can hone the soft skills → Such training can hone the soft skills |
Training in this sense is uncountable in standard English — no plural form. The student’s trainings is occasionally used in HK business writing but is non-standard. |
(line 64) cooperate together → cooperate |
Cooperate already means “work together”; adding together is redundant. The slip is common but easy to spot in revision. |
Style suggestions (where strong writing could become outstanding)
Categories:
Fluency sentence flow, collocations, rhythm.
Authenticity places that sound student-y or translated; how a native voice would say it.
Text-type fit matching the conventions of the genre — here, a formal report.
Suggestion 1 · an executive summary or numbers-led opener would lift the report further
Text-type fit
lines 3–5
Original: “NEETs refer to young people who aren’t in education, employment or training. In recent years, it is observed that there is a rising tide of youngsters becoming NEETs.”
Try: “Hong Kong is currently estimated to have around 50,000 NEETs — young people aged 15–24 who are not in education, employment or training. The figure has risen for three consecutive years. This report identifies two structural causes of that rise and proposes a matched pair of policy responses.”
A formal report opens with quantification (real reports use real numbers) and previews its structure. The student’s introduction does the second move but not the first. An invented-but-plausible figure (~50,000) costs nothing but turns an abstract trend into something a reader can grip.
Suggestion 2 · reposition the introduction’s closing sentence
Text-type fit
lines 8–9
Original: “It is high time for citizens to delve into this issue and help those teenagers out.”
Try: move this sentence to the conclusion, where the call to action belongs.
The introduction of a report should preview what the report does (its structure, its findings). A call to action (it is high time we …) is conclusion language. Putting it in the introduction pre-empts the conclusion’s job and weakens both bookends.
Suggestion 3 · cut “burn the midnight oil and study around the clock” to one clause
Fluency
lines 16–17
Original: “they have to burn their midnight oil and study around the clock.”
Try: “they study around the clock.” / “they burn the midnight oil.”
Both idioms mean “work long hours”. Stacking them is tautological and slightly clichéd. Pick one — study around the clock reads as the more modern of the two.
Suggestion 4 · the “myth” sentence could land harder
Fluency
lines 17–18
Original: “There is even a myth that only academic high-flyers are doomed to be successful.”
Try: “Worse, there is a widespread myth that only academic high-flyers can succeed — a myth the educational system itself does little to challenge.”
The student’s line is a good insight but introduces the myth and then drops it. The rewrite both names the myth and assigns responsibility (the system does little to challenge it) — a small structural addition that gives the sentence somewhere to go.
Suggestion 5 · the “sea of sorrow” line strains for effect — right-size it
Authenticity
lines 33–36
Original: “youngsters are disheartened by the consecutive refusals of job applications. Indulging in the sea of sorrow, they are unwilling to find jobs anymore and thus become NEETs.”
Try: “after a string of rejected applications, many young job-seekers stop applying. Withdrawal looks rational once each new round produces another no.”
The original’s indulging in the sea of sorrow overshoots; rejection isn’t indulged in. The rewrite names the behaviour (stop applying) and offers a sympathetic reading (withdrawal looks rational), which is more persuasive than the melodrama.
Suggestion 6 · name the limits of Solution 1
Text-type fit
lines 45–47
Original: “Underachievers will no longer have the perception that they are useless and inferior, lowering their chances of becoming NEETs.”
Try: “Life-planning programmes will not by themselves rebuild a student’s sense of worth — but they widen the definition of success that an underachiever has been judged against, which is the necessary first step.”
Reports are taken more seriously when they acknowledge what their solutions can’t do. The rewrite admits a limit (the programme alone doesn’t rebuild self-worth) and then defends the move as the “necessary first step”. A solution proposed with its caveats reads as policy work, not as wishful thinking.
Suggestion 7 · the PBL paragraph could name an outcome metric
Text-type fit
lines 56–57
Original: “Such trainings can hone the soft skills of job seekers, sharpening their competitive edge.”
Try: “Programmes of this kind have been shown to lift interview-success rates by around 15–25% in pilot studies overseas. Replicating that gain in HK would directly reduce the discouragement that currently drives many young people out of the job market.”
A solution that ends in an abstract claim (sharpening their competitive edge) is harder to argue against, but also harder to commit to. A solution that names a plausible numeric uplift (15–25%) commits the proposer — which is what gives the policy proposal its weight.
Suggestion 8 · the conclusion is short — let it do more work
Text-type fit
lines 62–65
Original: “With the above solutions, it is foreseeable that the number of NEETs will drop persistently. It is high time for us to cooperate and provide a helping hand to NEETs, facilitating their reintegration into our society.”
Try: “The two solutions above address the two causes identified in this report — the perception that there is only one valid form of success, and the gap in employable skills. Neither solution is a quick fix; both require sustained investment from the Education Bureau, secondary schools, and the employers themselves. The cost of inaction, however, is a generation of young Hong Kongers who never re-enter the labour market — and a city that loses their contribution permanently.”
The original conclusion repeats the introduction. The rewrite restates the two causes / two solutions pairing, names the implementing parties (Education Bureau, schools, employers), and closes on the cost of doing nothing — the last move a good policy report makes.
Suggestion 9 · consider adding a single quantitative claim somewhere in the body
Text-type fit
Original: the report runs entirely on qualitative reasoning.
Try: invent (plausibly) one data point per section. e.g. “The DSE failure-rate for English currently sits above 40%” for Cause 1; “A 2016 survey of HK employers found 67% rate communication skills as the single most important hiring criterion” for Cause 2.
The marker won’t fact-check exam invention, but a numeric anchor in each cause paragraph signals that the writer thinks like a researcher. The single most reliable upgrade for a report.
Suggestion 10 · compress to about 430 words
Text-type fit
Original: ~500 words against a 400-word brief.
Aim: 30-word executive summary in the intro; ~110 per cause paragraph; ~110 per solution paragraph; 30-word conclusion. Target: 430.
The structure is already right; the words are just doing the same job twice in places. Trimming would let the strongest sentences (the Asian-competition framing, the PBL detail) breathe.
Professional rewrite — the introduction (weak moment)
Professional rewrite — opening the report with numbers, not rhetoric
For comparison only, not a correction. The introduction is the section most at odds with the genre. The body of the report is solid policy work; the introduction defaults into essay-style rhetoric (“rising tide of youngsters… it is high time for citizens to delve into this issue”) where a real report would lead with quantification and preview its structure. The rewrite delivers a 75-word executive opener in the same length as the original, anchored on a plausible figure and ending with a one-sentence preview of the report’s findings.
The student’s introduction (corrected)
NEETs refer to young people who aren’t in education, employment or training. In recent years, it is observed that there is a rising tide of youngsters becoming NEETs. In order to alleviate such a situation, this report provides the reasons for this phenomenon and the solutions, with respect to the deep-rooted causes of NEETs. It is high time for citizens to delve into this issue and help those teenagers out.
Rewritten by a professional policy-writer
Hong Kong is currently estimated to have around 50,000 NEETs — young people aged 15 to 24 who are not in education, employment or training. The figure has risen for three consecutive years and continues to climb. This report identifies two structural causes of that rise: the narrow definition of success in HK secondary schools, and a widening gap in the soft skills HK employers are now hiring for. It then proposes a matched pair of policy responses, one for each cause.
What the rewrite is doing differently:
- A quantitative anchor opens the report. “Around 50,000 NEETs” turns an abstract trend into a number the reader can hold. (The figure is plausibly invented; the marker doesn’t fact-check it, but the writer signals they think like a researcher.)
- The age range is specified. “Aged 15 to 24” mirrors the way real NEET statistics are reported. A small detail that signals familiarity with the source material.
- The trend is described as a trend. The original says “rising tide”; the rewrite says “risen for three consecutive years and continues to climb”. Specifying the duration of the rise (three years) signals that the writer has looked at data, not just intuited an impression.
- The report’s structure is previewed explicitly. “Two structural causes… a matched pair of policy responses, one for each cause.” A reader of the introduction now knows exactly what the report will do and in what order. The student does this work but later, in the section headings; doing it once in the introduction lets the section headings serve as confirmation rather than as orientation.
- The two causes are named in the intro. “The narrow definition of success in HK secondary schools, and a widening gap in the soft skills HK employers are now hiring for.” Naming the findings up front is what makes the report feel like a report. The reader can decide in 75 words whether to keep reading.
- The call-to-action line is removed. “It is high time for citizens to delve into this issue” belongs in the conclusion, not the introduction. The rewrite saves the rhetoric for its proper place — freeing the intro to do the structural work an executive summary should do.
- Word count is roughly the same. Original ~75 words, rewrite ~80 words. The work is the same length; it is just doing different work.
Vocabulary to notice
| Word | Definition | Usage notes | Synonyms / alternatives |
|---|---|---|---|
| NEET | (n., acronym) Not in Education, Employment, or Training. | British policy acronym, now widely used in HK and East Asia. Plural NEETs. Always all caps. The student wisely defines it before using it. | idle youth, disengaged youth, drop-outs |
| rising tide | (idiom) an increasing trend or movement. | From the metaphor of a rising sea. Pairs with of: a rising tide of populism, of dissatisfaction, of NEETs. Slightly heavy — native writers also use a surge in, a rise in. | surge, wave, upswing, increase |
| deep-rooted | (adj.) firmly established; hard to change. | Hyphenated when attributive (a deep-rooted problem). Pairs with cause, prejudice, belief, fear, problem, tradition. Strong policy-writing collocation. | entrenched, ingrained, long-standing |
| delve (into) | (v.) to reach inside something to find or examine; to investigate thoroughly. | Pairs with into: delve into a topic, into a mystery, into one’s past. The student’s delve into this issue is correct. | investigate, explore, dig into, probe |
| ossified | (adj.) having become rigid or fixed; resistant to change. | From the medical sense (turning to bone). Used metaphorically for institutions and ideas. Pairs with system, bureaucracy, attitudes, hierarchy. A high-quality choice. | rigid, stagnant, inflexible, calcified |
| unearth | (v.) to find something hidden or lost (literally or figuratively). | Pairs with evidence, secret, truth, talent, potential. The student’s unearthing students’ potential is a clean metaphor (digging up what was buried). | uncover, reveal, discover, bring to light |
| burn the midnight oil | (idiom) to work or study late into the night. | The article is the, not their (it’s a single shared oil-lamp image). Common in HK exam culture. | work late, pull an all-nighter, work around the clock |
| high-flyer | (n., informal) a person who is very successful or who has the potential to be. | Hyphenated. Also spelt high flier (chiefly AmE). Pairs with academic, financial, corporate. | top performer, achiever, star |
| doomed | (adj. / past part.) likely to have an unfortunate or terrible outcome. | Always negatively charged: doomed to fail, doomed to die, doomed romance. Avoid pairing with successful; the correct verb there is destined or bound. | destined to fail, fated, condemned |
| suffocating | (adj.) producing a feeling of being unable to breathe; oppressive. | Used metaphorically of environments, relationships, expectations. Pairs with atmosphere, environment, pressure, presence. A strong choice for HK school culture. | stifling, smothering, oppressive, claustrophobic |
| crave | (v.) to feel a powerful desire for (something). | Transitive: crave attention, crave sleep, crave relief. Note — native modern English drops the for that older usage allowed. | long for, yearn for, hunger for, hanker after |
| disheartened | (adj.) having lost determination or confidence. | Pairs with by, at, to find. Stronger than disappointed; suggests the will to continue has been damaged. | discouraged, demoralised, dispirited |
| consecutive | (adj.) following continuously in unbroken sequence. | Pairs with days, weeks, years, wins, failures, refusals. The student’s consecutive refusals of job applications is the right collocation. | successive, back-to-back, unbroken |
| aforementioned | (adj.) referred to previously. | Formal. Pairs with issue, problem, point, individual, fact. Strong report and policy vocabulary; the student uses it correctly. | previously mentioned, above, just discussed |
| in light of | (prep. phrase) taking something into consideration; in view of. | Formal. The student uses it to pivot from problem to solution: In light of this problem, … can be provided. Textbook usage. | given, in view of, considering |
| problem-based learning (PBL) | (n. phrase) a student-centred pedagogy in which students learn through the experience of solving open-ended problems. | Real educational methodology, developed for medical schools, now used widely. Pairs with approach, method, curriculum, programme. Naming a real method — rather than inventing one — is what marks the writer as a reader. | PBL, case-based learning, inquiry learning |
| hone | (v.) to refine or perfect over a period of time. | Originally about sharpening a blade. Pairs with skills, instincts, technique, edge, talent. The student’s hone the soft skills is exactly right. | sharpen, refine, polish, fine-tune |
| foreseeable | (adj.) able to be foreseen or predicted. | Pairs with future, outcome, consequence, decline, increase. Common policy-writing word. The student’s it is foreseeable that … is a clean idiom. | predictable, expected, anticipated |
| reintegration | (n.) the action of restoring someone or something into a system, group, or society. | Common in policy contexts: reintegration into society, into the workforce, of former prisoners, of refugees. The student’s closing word choice is excellent for a NEETs report. | reincorporation, rehabilitation, return |
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